Thursday 28 March 2013

Five Million Reasons I'm giving to Syria

Today I was invited along by Tearfund to the Disaster Emergency Committee's Syria Live event hosted in the BT Tower in London. After a rather embarrassing 'I think I'm lost, oh THERE is the giant tower!' moment I arrived and got acquainted with some fellow tweeters. What followed was an hour Q&A with six leading experts from the UK's biggest humanitarian organisations. It is well worth a listen to the event and you can find it on the DEC website.

from dec.org.uk
While I was at the event I was mulling over what an appropriate post would be from all the heart rending and inspiring stories the experts were sharing with us. Ultimately it all comes down to to those, to the 5 million people trapped or displaced as a result of the conflict in Syria each with their own desperate needs, individual stories and hopes for the future. There are five million reasons right there to donate right now. I have also put together my top ten, however, for why I am donating today.
  1. The money given to the DEC goes straight to partner organisations in our leading charities who are working on the ground NOW. The cash will get directly to those who are in extreme need of basic food supplies and medicine. The channels are open, the needs identified, they just need the cash.
  2. The scale of the crisis is massive and escalating. 8,000 people, up from 1,000 at the start of the year, are fleeing Syria every single day. Basic supplies are desperately needed for the camps receiving them in Jordan and Lebanon.
  3. Civilians are being disproportionately affected by the conflict. A large proportion of the refugees fleeing Syria are women and children.
  4. The conflict has been going on for much longer than expected and is now considered to be the worst humanitarian crisis in the 21st century.
  5. Half of all refugees are children and are falling behind in their education. The money you give would allow partners to provide education for these children in the refugee camps to allow them to stay on track for until they return home.
  6. On escaping from the country people face life threatening situations as they pass through active conflict. Our donations means that when they cross the border they are welcomed with supplies, support and a reminder that the international community cares as well as supporting people who are trapped in Syria and unable to flee.
  7. The DEC partner organisations are directly consulting with affected people in Syria on how they feel the money should be spent ensuring the money gets to what they consider to be the most important needs.
  8. Individuals and organizations in countries hosting refugees are working in a massively sacrificial manner to care for vulnerable people. Teachers are working double shifts to try and fit in extra children in schools that have doubled in size over night. Our donations can provide additional support to these overstretched areas.
  9. Partner organisations are looking to people's emotional as well as physical well being. The level of suffering is overwhelming, our donations provide someone to care and to help people rebuild their lives.
  10. These are people just like us, having babies, wanting to care for their children and get on with normal life and yet have been chased from their homes in fear. Let's stand with them.
Donate online here.

Monday 25 March 2013

Be Kind, Be True

These two tiny phrases have become somewhat of a motto for me over the last week. Not that this means I am close to fully achieving either but I remember these words in a pendant hanging around my neck and I aim for them even if I miss the mark most days.

Despite the cold weather Oxford is a particularly brilliant place to be at this time of the year. We have just finished up with the Oxford Literary Festival which last year was bathed in gorgeous spring sunlight and this year has been a winter wonderland with the 'dreaming spires' covered in snow. Each year I take myself to a few events, whatever takes my fancy from the catalogue, and hope to expand my mind and outlook a little.


This year, in my quest to 'Be True' about being female today, I went to a couple of discussion groups by notable feminists. As it's University Easter vacation I've also had the immense pleasure of being able to read some of the books I've been stockpiling over the term that essay deadlines have prevented me from getting in to. This week I've been in a world of the history of Feminism reading about Catherine of Sienna, Mary Wollstonecroft, Jospehine Butler, Emmeline Pankhurst and Simone De Beauviour to name but a few. None of their stories are of a perfect person who always gets it right but they are all of extraordinarily brave women who sought truth and spoke out in the face of conflict, resistance and personal attack. Their legacy is our personal freedoms that they only imagined.

As I read these stories, and move on to reading a social history about women's lives in England from 1750 onwards, there is the inevitable tinge of sadness. The wasted opportunities, the cries that leap straight of the page at you from centuries back from women being seen as less that human, incapable of contribution and so painfully lost because of this. Perhaps in this modern age we don't feel we have much time for this. What is the point of reading and knowing the stories of the women that came before us and made all of the many freedoms we enjoy possible? Why not just enjoy what we have?

Two simple reasons spring from a sober evaluation of where we really are. So many women still live in these kinds of situations around the world and face violence and oppression simply for being female. And, secondly, I sincerely believe that we do ourselves, and the girls coming behind us. a massive disservice if we ignore the situation in our own culture. We are the culture that presents a body image for women that is destroying our teenagers, annorexia is a western phenomenon. We are still being paid less than men for doing the same jobs, we are under represented in nearly all businesses, and in politics at all levels. Don't even get me started on the Church.
 
Most of all I seriously wonder, how often women's voices are really being heard. What stories are we telling about being female? What role models are being laid down? That we need to be thin, pretty and able to juggle everything? But woe betide you if you are thin, pretty and aspiring for leadership, then you need to be masculine to be taken seriously. These short reflections are simply a drop in the ocean, look closely at a women's magazine and ask, what are we really saying about being a woman today?

The history of being female may not always be a pretty one but it is there, it both empowers and causes despairs but it is true. This is our story whether we hear it or not and I really think we need to hear it. And so I am wearing my pendant round my neck to remind myself to 'Be True'. To remind myself to seek truth and hear it. And I am wearing it alongside a pendant that reminds me to 'Be Kind' to listen with patience to stories as I encounter them, to always see others as fully human and to approach their points of view and tangled lives with the gentleness that I approach mine. Be Kind, Be True. What is your motto for the week?

Tuesday 19 March 2013

When the Church Said No - She Loves Magazine

She Loves Magazine is a brilliant collection of women's stories from around the globe and is a frequent inspiration to me so I am so happy to be featuring on their site today. I originally sent a more general article about the failure of the the vote on women bishops in the Church of England last November and its effect on women but they asked me to submit a personal reflection on what is was like to be a shiny and new female ordinand at that time. Answer? Tough.

Shelovemagazine.com/sarscreative.com
I have to say it was pretty hard to write. I spent a good twenty minutes staring at my screen and umm-ing and ahh-ing to my office mate about what I wanted to say. After the initial reaction of sadness and dismay shortly after the vote I hadn't really processed how I felt about the whole episode. There were certainly some things to work through to get these words on paper.

So do stop by and have a read and be sure to check out some of the other fabulous and inspiring stories on the site.

Wednesday 13 March 2013

Being human

Things come in and out of the news so fast that it is so easy for us to move on just as fast. The wars rage and rumble away in the back ground but our lives carry on: work, caring for our families, all the normal things of life. But sometimes the human thing to do is to stop and to listen again. To listen to the voices of the people that desperately need our help and wonder deeply what we can do about it.

I've recently been asked by Tearfund to be part of their blogging team. Long term readers of my blog will know that Tearfund has a very special place in my heart and I have written, fund raised and generally shouted about their work for some time now. Their work is on the ground, done by local people and makes a real difference. I know, I've seen it for myself.

In many countries the church is best placed to respond to situations of disaster and crisis. They are already in their communities and have the local knowledge needed to address the areas of most desperate need. Tearfund utilizes this potential and enables them to reach out to their communities, of all faiths and none, with the provisions and support they require.



A Refugee Camp for Syrian Refugees - Eleanor Bentall, Tearfund
Tearfund are masters of collecting stories and that is the one thing I believe we desperately need to hear. That on the other end of a conflict are real people with real lives that are suddenly, violently interrupted by events outside of their control. And yet in these disasters we see the extent of human bravery and resilience. Babies are born and homes are made wherever we can find them. This video really says it all:
 

In Syria the crisis is escalating. Four million people have been affected by the violence and there are now over one million refugees, a figure reached much sooner than anticipated by the UN. On her trip Katie also met five families who had fled to Jordan, all of whom were living in a three bedroom flat. In an interview with Katie one of the fathers, Aamil, shared his story of fleeing his home.


Aamil and his family. Photo -  Eleanor Bentall, Tearfund

"We were living in Deraa when something like 20,000 soldiers came into our neighbourhood. They started shooting and killed about 300 people. They also burned our houses. So we left our homes carrying nothing, no money, no food, no clothing, only the things that we are wearing, that’s all. They were pursuing us with tanks so I took my whole family and left that neighbourhood. We left immediately and went to Zaatari [a refugee camp] in Jordan”

Food and shelter, the most basic of needs, are in desperately short supply. Medical help is absent and intensely required.

We don’t have any food at all. Nobody has helped us and we suffer from cold during the night especially.”


Photo - Eleanor Bentall, Tearfund

Aamil hopes to return to Syria when the violence has ended but in the meantime the basics of life are desperately needed by him and many other families who have escaped the conflict.

It is easy to close our eyes, to go on with our day and put this kind of suffering to one side in our minds. But, as in all things, we have a choice and we CAN make a difference. Today can be an ordinary day or it can be a day where we let someone on the other side of the world know that we care for them. It can be a day where we cover our ears or where we take our petitions loudly to the ear of God. It can be a day where we allow humanity to be defined as violent and destructive or where we play our part in showing what being truly human really is.

Please pray. Please give. And please keep hearing these stories.

Monday 11 March 2013

Talitha Koumi

Here's a Monday morning message for you – Talitha Koumi! ''Tali- what?' I hear you cry! The phrase Talitha Koumi is said by Jesus in Mark 5:42 when he heals a twelve year old girl and it translates 'Little girl, Arise!' If you are not a Christian then bear with me, there really is something in this for all womankind!

After my post on Friday I wasn't quite expecting that my journey into exploring what it means to be a woman today would start with such a bang and would start the very next day! I'd been planning to go to the Talitha Koumi Women's Leadership Conference at Tearfund for some time but being busy, and generally spending my time worrying about the prologue of John's gospel and what not, I didn't really have many expectations.

And didn't I get a great surprise! First of all it was extraordinary to be in a room full of Christian women all hugely gifted, colourful and splendid creatures and watching them one by one wipe the sleep from their eyes and do exactly what that phrase demands and arise. We heard about identity from Kate Coleman, whose amazing book I have blogged about before, and about all the things we can do as women to shoot ourselves in the foot as leaders. Desperate need to please, never saying no and allowing everyone else to dictate who you are, anyone? There were so many nodding heads in the room that it was like being in a room full of Churchill dogs (in the nicest possible way!)

There were some absolutely classic sound bites, a woman standing up and pondering why is was she could work in some of the most dangerous conflict zones in the world and lead multi-million pound teams and yet was only qualified to pour the tea in church and a lesson in tackling some of the inevitable flack as a female leader with a brilliant sense of humour from Elaine Storkey, President of Tearfund. There I was with a renowned Theologian and a former President of the Baptist Union in the UK and a hundred women all asking questions just like me and I wanted to stand up, clap my hands and yell 'Thank GOD!' (I seem to be drawn to this standing on chairs and yelling thing fairly often these days!)

For me it was a massively affirming time. I spent twenty minutes with a wonderful woman who was so genuinely excited about everything that I was doing and hoping for that I left with refreshed vision and motivation. And now here I am on Monday morning, with a mixed bag of feelings and all the usual challenges to take on again in my life but that phrase keeps ringing in my ears. Talitha Koumi, Talitha Koumi, Talitha Koumi. Little girl, get up, arise, stand up, be counted. As Kate very firmly said to us, 'Little girl, grow up.'

There are too many things to count that could overwhelm me on this journey, the arrows come from all angles and sometimes from the least expected places. But the way I see it we have two options. We can let the crap that comes our way overwhelm us, we can bow to it, stay quiet and stay in our places or we can get up, grow up and take responsibility for ourselves, our leadership and our lives. What do you want to do today? Who do you want to be? What do you need to say? I say to you: 'Talitha Koumi.' Little girl, arise.

Thursday 7 March 2013

International Women's Day - Women and the Church

Since starting training for ministry in the Church of England I think a lot about being a woman. Partly because our being there is still a fact that is remarkable to many people in the church even though we have been being ordained for twenty years now. The comments of others can certainly drive me crazy, the constant obsession with dress (For the record: I don't want to look like a man or like I just stepped out of the 1980s, I just want to look like me) and the constant application of 'lady' to any title (lady-vicar anyone?!) but quite often the many thoughts come from me.

From the incredible frustration of seeing a room full of entirely male Bishops and wanting to stand on my chair and scream 'What is going on here? It's 2013?!!' The incredible vacuum when it comes to female role models. I'm sick of being talked to about gender by men. 90% of every reading list I get given is by male writers. We are so used to it I don't even think we see it any more. I don't want to see women there for the sake of it. I just want there to be more excellent female scholars and leaders. I want to learn from and be inspired by some strong, confident and successful women but again and again these top jobs are occupied by men.

In some ways this all adds up to an enormous level of pressure. As a young women in a universally male dominated institution the fate of womankind can feel like it is weighing on your shoulders. The remarks about how women aren't getting the theological education needed to be senior leaders or building the confidence to apply for the top roles (if they could even apply for them at all, which as we know they currently can't) are common. The beedy eye of expectation is turning towards our generation and I can't help but wonder if we are up for the task.

Of course we want to take it on. Goodness me, we really do, for all the reasons I have given above. But before that I think we have some work to do. I think we need a positive discourse. I'm searching for it myself. Not just what women are not in comparison to what men are but what we are in our own right. What does it mean to be a woman in Britain in 2013? What does it mean to be a Christian women? This is my journey right now and I'm afraid I don't have any answers.

I know what I don't want. I don't want to spend my life thinking about my thighs and embarking on bizarre diets. I don't want to spend my life chasing a man (good job as I'm married!). I don't want to live in the shadow of my husband or for him to live in mine. I don't want to be someones assistant because I'm too afraid to be their boss. I don't want to miss chances because of lack of confidence and be another stat for why women aren't getting into the roles they should be. I don't want my gender identity to be dictated to me by advertising slogans or out of date theories, bad theology and dodgy preconceptions. I want to have a voice and I want you to have one too.

But as for that positive discourse, well Reader, I am still looking. And of course, you can be assured, I'll take you along with me on the way.
 
Linking up with Lulastic's International Women's Day Blog Link Up, stop by for many other fab bloggers celebrating everything female and probably ranting a lot less than me! ;)
 
Happy International Women's Day!

















International Women's Day



Since starting training for ministry in the Church of England I think a lot about being a woman. Partly because it seems to be a fact that is immensely interesting and remarkable to many people in the church even though, shock horror, we make up 50% of the human race and have been being ordained for twenty years now. The comments of others certainly drive me crazy, the constant obsession with dress (For the record: I don't want to look like a man or like I just stepped out of the 1980s, I want to look like me) and the constant application of 'lady' to any title (lady-vicar anyone?!) but quite often the many thoughts come from me.



The incredible frustration of seeing a room full of white haired Etonian Bishops and wanting to stand on my chair and scream 'What is going on here? It's 2013?!!' The incredible vacuum when it comes to female role models. I'm sick of being talked to about gender by men. 90% of every reading list I get given is by male writers. We are so used to it I don't even think we see it any more. I don't want to see women there for the sake of it. I just want there to be more excellent female scholars and leaders. I want to learn from and be inspired by some strong, confident and successful women but again and again these top jobs are occupied by men.



In some ways this all adds up to an enormous level of pressure. As a young women in a universally male dominated institution the fate of womankind can feel like it is weighing on your shoulders. Those wonderfully positive people remark how women aren't getting the theological education needed to be senior leaders or building the confidence to apply for the top roles (if they could even apply for them at all, which as we know they currently can't). The beedy eye of expectation is turning towards our generation and I can't help but wonder if we are up for the task.



Of course we want to take it on. Goodness me, do we for all the reasons I have given above. But before that I think we have some work to do. I think we need a positive discourse. I'm searching for it myself. Not just what women are not in comparison to what men are but what we are in our own right. What does it mean to be a woman in Britain in 2013? What does it mean to be a Christian women? This is my journey right now and I'm afraid I don't have any answers.



I know what I don't want. I don't want to spend my life thinking about my thigh and embarking on bizarre diets. I don't want to spend my life chasing a man (good job as I'm married!). I don't want to live in the shadow of my husband or for him to live in mine. I don't want to be someone's assistant because I'm too afraid to be their boss. I don't want to miss chances because of lack of confidence and be another stat for why women aren't getting into the roles they should be. I don't want my gender identity to be dictated to me by advertising slogans or the theories made up in male dominated universities. I want to have a voice and I want you to have one too.

But as for that positive discourse, well reader I am still looking. And of course, you can be assured, I'll take you along with me on the way.

















Sunday 3 March 2013

In which I know everything and nothing at all

Studying, what larks eh? Hours in the books, eons over essays and in our case a bewildering ninety minutes with our brilliant but brain fuddling tutor each week. You emerge, you hope slightly better informed, but more than anything completely, blatantly aware of you own huge inadequacies. Man, I love it! I can feel my wings spreading out with every passing moment, my mind stretching, my perceptions blowing wide open.


The whole process of coming into training has been a suspension of control. Rather than being able to plan out where my life is going and set neat little markers up so I can see where everything is and the way ahead now I just live day by day. Sure, I have hopes and dreams and a vague sense of where it is all going but the particulars and details are all in the imagination of God and I'm just doing what he has laid out on the table before me right now. Each day is completely spontaneous and entirely dictated by other people, it is terrifying and liberating. Every week I am asked to do something utterly bizarre that nine times out of ten I'm not totally convinced I can do. But then I do it and it's ok and my confidence grows.

What I'm learning is that if the future isn't meticulously planned out then there is nowhere else to live but the present moment. There is nothing but the opportunities that present themselves and then going for it with laughter and enthusiasm.
 
This week I spent an hour colouring talking about the merits of blue v.s purple hair with eight year olds, an evening dancing to the most insanely cheesy music man has every recorded to CD with a bunch of trainee vicars, mulled over the ins and outs of divine wisdom, plumbed the depths of my understanding of the mother heart of God and wore bright yellow shoes just for the fun of it. I find myself grabbing moments, grabbing life by the shirt collars, giving it a good shake and seeing what comes out.

As the end of term two beckons I'm so glad to be here. To be simultaneously discovering everything I want to be and landing firmly on my backside realizing everything that I'm not. Being a total idiot one moment and being more than I thought I could be the next. Knowing everything and knowing nothing at all.